THE BOXES

Tao, my youngest rug rat

I spent the day yesterday going through boxes, and boxes, and boxes which have been piled in my garage since Bird moved in with me this summer. Today his lady friend will stop by to pick up what he wanted her to have. I have not been able to reach the young man who was to receive Bird’s power tools, so those will be set aside until he shows up.

My brother, like the rest of our family, was a packrat, strongly believing that even if you haven’t used something for years, you will need it the day after you get rid of it. When my daughter and I packed for him, we were warned not to throw away anything! We heeded his wishes, for the most part, but I didn’t even bother to open those boxes which my daughter had labeled ‘Bird’s Junk’. Those, together with his clothes, will be picked up by a truck from the organization catering to the homeless. I worked for that organization for 4 years, and know it will be well distributed.

I wasn’t looking forward to the task, but it actually wasn’t so bad. Yes, more than once I had to swallow hard to keep going, but just as often I laughed, recalling events surrounding a certain article, or shaking my head as I wondered why on earth he would have kept this or that. In his papers I found every card I had ever given him for his birthday or for Christmas over the years. I wasn’t surprised; I put them away where I keep all those he has given me.

I’m pretty adept at controlling my feelings when I’m awake and alert. Our defenses crumble when we sleep. Hauling all those boxes around made me tired enough to snooze for a couple of hours last night, and I don’t remember what I dreamed to wake me up in such a mood. I just knew, when my eyes opened, there would be no use of my trying to stay in bed. Even working, my usual escape, was not going to help. On Friday night my daughter-in-law had sent me a trilogy written by Nora Roberts, so I picked up the first book and lost myself in her story. I should send that writer a thank you card.

I am tired this morning, but it’s a brand new day. The sun is shining, and my daughter is on her way here now; she’ll be staunch moral support as I watch the first of Bird’s belonging be taken away. Maybe this evening I’ll drop in on my daughter-in-law to thank her for the books, and to immerse myself in cuddles from my three young grandbabies. I’ve yet to find something to better soothe emotions than the kisses and hugs from those beautiful rug rats. I know, when I leave to come home, that I’ll be SMILING.

Luv from the Bush in Quebec