GLITCHES...AND SNOW!!!

Photo courtesy of Henleysroom in Photobucket

Snow!!!

And traffic!!!

Not that I am venturing out very far, but my technician is attempting to reach the city. He is to disconnect all the computers, the telephone system, and the alarm; tomorrow he will reinstall it here at home. He doesn’t have keys to the office door, but someone was supposed to meet him there this morning at 10 AM – a young man who uses our conference room to train his new employees. I guess the young man either got out of bed late or is stuck in traffic too, and is not answering his phone. On the other hand, the technician has called me at least 4 times. He has more appointments and limited time to do my job….and he’s beginning to panic! It would be so nice if something could go smoothly for once, but it looks like the ‘once’ is not going to be today.

It was wonderful to spend time with my son last night. On the drive into the city he regaled me with the latest antics of our 3 rug rats, brought me up to date on his lady’s operation (they’ve found ‘another ‘hernia….or did they miss it when operating??), and we discussed his having sold his business to become an employee (he’s quite happy with his decision, and that’s what counts!). He got busy with the drill, I tackled the boxes, and we worked together with rock music as backup. Jo is lead singer in a group with one CD to his credit, and his voice blended perfectly as he sang along. I wasn’t about to spoil it by making my ‘joyful noise’, so I compensated by executing a few dance steps around the desks. With empty cartons as my partners, there were no toes to step on, tee-hee!

I have a full day ahead of me – the garage to prepare for the invasion of office furniture, making room in my home office for loads of files and paper, letters to send out to clients and suppliers about the change of address, etc., etc.

Even with my technician’s panic, or the long list of ‘things to do’; and in spite of very little sleep under my belt, not much can spoil my mood this morning. My reaction to the first snow is like that of a little child – total exhilaration!!!

Am I SMILING?? You bet! The grin is from ear to ear! I’m anticipating sneaking outside for a short romp with Grump in that lovely white stuff before the day is done!

You know, of course, that the SMILE is winging its way through cyberspace…it will be knocking on your door any minute now!!

Luv from the Bush in Quebec.

WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM MY FRIENDS...

My 3 rug rats in a forvorite place - M'mère's jaccuzi!

While I was at the office yesterday, the supplier dumped a load of firewood in front of my garage. The delivery is late. It had been scheduled at least two months ago, so that I would have plenty of time to bring it in before winter.

The Habs-Boston game was already playing; the temptation was too much, and I watched the first period before checking the weather forecast. Just as I feared, there is a bright, red warning indicated for our area. My demons are to return in full force by tomorrow, trailing loads of snow and freezing rain….and all that wood sitting outside!

I’m in the midst of packing in the city. Last weekend my garage, where the office equipment will be stored, was emptied of most of Bird’s house belongings. What remains needs to be shifted to make room for both the wood and the truckload of office furniture and boxes .There are two financial statements to prepare and tax remittances for three companies to be done – and all this by the end of the month! I was feeling slightly overwhelmed.

Then…grandson to the rescue! Fred came upstairs, doing his daily trek to fill my fire baskets, and told me that he is not working today, so will take care of bringing in the wood. He started the ball rolling. I grabbed the telephone and contacted my ex’s mom. She agreed to come by Thursday night and pick up the number of his metal tool boxes that have been taking up space for the past year. When my youngest son finishes work tonight, he and I will drive into the city. While he is manipulating the drill to remove wall hangings, counters, stalls and whatever furniture needs to be disassembled, I’ll continue packing documents. I counted on my fingers. There should be just enough time to complete most of the tasks…with a little help from my friends. (I love that Beatles tune!)

I’m kidding myself. There will NOT be enough time to get it done to my satisfaction…but the most important things will be handled. Time for a change of attitude!

There is wood to keep me warm; the daily 4 hour commute to work is nearly over; there is a greedy and complicated government forcing clients to keep me in a job, so I have a roof over my head. I don’t even need to get into the health, family, and friends thing to realize that I’m extremely lucky.

Speaking of family – I’m putting everything on hold to babysit my 3 little rug rats this Saturday. There’s the real priority!! I’m looking forward to all the giggles and SMILES! Sharing them with you!

Luv from the Bush in Quebec.

INTRODUCING...SMILES!

My sister in law, the sweet Lori. What a smile!

The last foster home was a dilly! When we had first arrived there, the lady told me that God had not seen fit to bless her with a child; both Bird and I were soon to find out why. After a few months of her tyranny, we started fighting back – as well as children can – and the problems escalated. When the police became involved, my mom made a momentous decision. She would dump the one boyfriend she had been seeing for years and, I fear, loved deeply, and marry the second. The former wanted nothing to do with her children; the latter would welcome us with open arms.

He and mom showed up one day and took us out of there. The man (we soon were calling him Dad) made us an ‘insta-family’, and within a couple of years, even added a baby brother. We nicknamed the little dude Pody.

The marriage couldn’t work, of course, but strong bonds were created between Dad and us. Even after they split and he left, taking our baby half-brother with him, we kept in touch. And the reason I’m telling you all this is to introduce my little brother, Pody, who has 3 of his own kids now, and his sweet wife, Lori. They live in New Brunswick.

Lori is a pearl from Newfoundland. She is one of the first persons I read on Facebook each day just because she is so upbeat and positive…and funny and, of course, SMILEY!! I think her post this morning on FB can explain it better than I ever could. Here you go:

Before leaving work Friday afternoon, I went in to clean the washrooms. A lady with a little boy walked over as I was going in and asked if we had a change station. I said yes and that I would sanitize it for her first. As I was cleaning she told me that her son hates getting changed on these stations. The little fella was about 14 months old. When I finished she brought him in and I started cleaning the mirror and sink. Then I heard him. The poor little guy started screaming at the top of his lungs. Thinking customers outside may be able to hear him, I started singing hoping it would calm him down.......'The itsy bitsy spider ran up the water spout......Down came the rain and washed the spider out'........The screaming stopped, so I kept singing. I was finishing up with 'Jingle Bells' when they came out of the stall. Mother and son were all smiles. She told me that she's never gotten service like that at a Tim Hortons before.....For those of you who have never heard me sing, I wasn't sure if that was a 'compliment' or a 'complaint'.....She asked if I sang as a hobby (compliment?!?!). We laughed as I told her it must be the bathroom acoustics.

Considering we are short-staffed and I was prepared for the worst this week, my whole week went really well......Lots of happy shiny people, hugs, coffee......and even though the week ended on a 'note' that was a little 'off-key', there were lots of smiles too! :o)

I’m in a rush today. Thanks to Lori, I still had time to post something cheerful!!

Sending my SMILE out to you with hers, folks, and wishing you a great day with many nice surprises - your first being double SMILES here!!!

Luv from the Bush in Quebec

GO, GRANNY, GO!!

Photo courtesy of Photobucket

“We’re going on the trip. I called Yo and booked it.” My daughter stirred milk into her café crema as she spoke. She had stopped by to cut her son’s (my tenant grandson) hair, and came upstairs to chat for a few minutes before leaving.

“So you managed to book that week off? Good!” I answered, as I joined her at the table. I knew she had been worried that changing the dates for her scheduled vacation would be a problem. When her brother had told us about the plans for holidays with his 6 closest friends, she had been avid to join them. These boys, who had practically been raised in our home, were like extended brothers to her. They are all going to turn 40 next year, and Bow had explained how, with much juggling of dates for their own and their wives’ availability, they had finally hit upon a week where the 12 of them could go down south and celebrate together. It promises to be a hilarious time!

Yoshiko, my son’s wife, now works for a travel agency, and was responsible for the arrangements. She had assured Shan that her name could be added to the group if she acted quickly. Vacationing with that gang could be nothing but fun; I was happy everything had worked out. I smiled as I pulled back my chair. It was a good thing I was already sitting when Shan spoke again.

“Did you hear me, Mom? I said WE are going. Double occupancy is only a couple of dollars more than single, and I’ve booked your name too. You’re coming with us. So get your butt in gear – you have 5 months to prepare.” The Cheshire cat had nothing on my daughter’s grin as she watched for my reaction. I’m sure the expression on my face did not disappoint her.

“Me??” I squeaked. “But….but …are you sure the boys will want this? They’re so much younger…and going down there to celebrate….”

“Already taken care of.” She smiled smugly. “And it’s YOU, Mom. You’ve always been invited to any of their parties, but Bow called around to make sure. They think it’s great!”

I’m still reeling.

If what my kids want is to take my mind of the difficult events of the last 3 years, I’d have to admit that they’ve succeeded. I went from total surprise, to denial, to worry, then to…wow – this is awesome – excitement! It has been so long since I’ve been on a trip to the ocean that I’m scrambling to remember what I’ll need to pack…except we’ll forget the bikini.

I don’t have to tell you that there’s a little dance in my step now, and even though I completely forgot to ask where we are going, I’m SMILING!!

Sending it out to y’all!!

Luv from the Bush in Quebec.

A FRAUD?

The sun setting over my mountain
It was a wicked day yesterday, for more than one reason.

Rush hour was horrendous. Fortunately, I had already covered that area on the auto route BEFORE the truck dumped his load of bricks all over the road, resulting in more than one flat tire for the traffic behind and beside it. My drive took two hours; I can imagine how long it was before those poor folks made it home.

Because of what has transpired concerning Line, the atmosphere in the office was strained, with each of us trying to pretend that things can go on as before until her things are moved out. That is impossible for the moment, of course. I have no doubt that we’ll get past it and preserve our friendship – but it will take time, and much effort required on both our parts.

Reading all your comments about how I handled this…I’m feeling grateful, but also a bit of a fraud. I do have a forgiving nature, and I find that harboring anger and ill-will drains energy. Maybe I’m too soft hearted to become a business mogul, but I am not that easy of a push-over either.

There was a method to my madness when I asked the client to advise his CA that Line would be handling his account in the future. I knew the CA wasn’t happy with her. He had called to complain about her work just before she left for vacation. In defense of my employee, I had explained to the CA how she had been handling the business on her own during my long absence; she was likely overwhelmed with work, etc. He didn’t sound convinced.

It was a throw of dice. If the client even mentions the change, maybe the CA will tell him of his skepticism….or maybe I defended her too well, and he’ll say nothing. I feel that I’ve pushed back a little – I didn’t take it completely lying down. Whatever happens now is in hands larger than mine; there will be a reason behind it, and it will be for the best in the long run.

So, you see, I turned the other cheek, but not with as much grace as implied by all those wonderful comments I received.

I’ve been working most of the night attempting to make a dent in the heaps of papers piled on my desk. UGH! The eternal catch-up!!! Right now I’m going to grab a couple of hour’s shut-eye. The phone will start ringing around 9 AM, and I need to be lucid by then.

Off I go, but not without thanking you all again, AND sending you wishes for a great day There’s a huge SMILE with that; hope it makes things a little brighter!!

Luv from the Bush in Quebec

A 'TAPS' inspired photo of sunrise at home
Not wanting to waste time commuting, I worked from home yesterday. However, Line & I needed to talk before I initiated the procedures that would move the office, so I sent her a text inquiring if she was in the city. Yes, she replied, and what did I think about her grabbing a bottle of wine then coming to spend the night with me in the bush? Great minds think alike, I texted. Maybe… but I was soon to discover that it’s not necessarily for the same reasons.

I am still somewhat perturbed.

Before my brother fell so ill, Line had decided to strike out on her own. With my laying her off, she would be eligible to collect unemployment insurance while finding clients and reactivating her former company. We would share the expenses of the smaller office, upkeep of the accounting programs, etc., and back each other up during the high season and our vacations.

When I returned to work after Bird’s passing, her plans had changed. She was selling her condo in the city and moving in with her friend, who does not reside in the area. She was leaving for a 10 day vacation within the week, and was more than fed up with accounting and the business. Although stunned, I could completely empathize with her. She had held the fort alone for so long. Besides, she saw me every day for the last 3 years, and has lived through my turbulent separation, my partner’s fiasco, losing Bud, now my brother…it has not been easy. She couldn’t help but share the heavy emotions I was feeling. In fact, it must have been extremely wearing for a person who thrives on positive influences.

It was her decision to drop our plans that motivated me to bring my office back home.

Line is not a drinker, and after two small glasses of wine she threw me the bomb. One of my best clients, the one she had offered to cover on her return from vacation last week (I had gratefully agreed; I was attempting to complete a complicated file for another customer) declared that he was going to change his account over to her new company. What???? This is a steady weekly account, one that I had set up and was serving before I hired Line. She has been covering it for three years…as my employee! I replaced her while she was on vacation, and had just warned him that she was relocating, and that it would be either me or someone else coming in the future. Now it seemed he had not known she was opening her own business and taking clients in this area, he did not want to break up his ‘team’, her rates were lower than mine...and, oh my….I don’t think I tasted the rest of the wine in my glass…it was gulped so quickly!

As she talked, my mind raced back to a few months ago, when she had first decided to branch out and was looking for clients. Another of my long standing accounts, one of the group she took care of and who, when warned nothing more would be done until he paid some of the sizable and long delinquent amount owed to my business, had apparently asked her if he could not switch over and work directly with her. I had blown a fuse when she approached me with this. What she was suggesting was a way he could ignore paying me and have his work done by someone familiar with his books…and paid by me. She reminded me that I had said I’d just as soon get rid of that client. True, I had said that…but it wasn’t happening until I was paid up!

I had told Bird about it during one of our chats. “Watch it!” he advised me. “She’s trying to steal your clients while you are out of action. When the cat’s away…” I denied it vigorously. This girl, who has been my close friend for years, had acted on the assumption that I wanted to get rid of the client. Even now I didn’t want to admit that Bird had possibly been right.

Life is all about choices. After Line went groggily to bed, I sat and thought about it all. The deception seemed enormous, but what mattered most to me? Keeping the client , or accepting that a dear friend, who had covered for me more than once; who, for such a long time, had helped me shoulder the burden of dealing with a hectic business while struggling with traumatic personal issues, was in a financial panic and was acting completely out of character? Which one of us needed help?

Before Line left this morning, I told her that I would call and discuss the issue with the client, then get back to her. Not wanting the client to be subject to a conflict of interest, I told him to feel at ease if he decided to switch to Line. The only thing I asked is that he advise his CA, who has referred other customers to me too. Being an honest businessman himself, he was ill at ease with the situation. His version of what had happened is not quite the same as hers.

I don’t care. I have decided to keep my friend. I can find other clients. There is no money equal to what this girl has given me over the years. I doubt it can ever be the same between us but, what the heck! Payback sometimes takes weird shapes.

Making a decision and being okay with it – it just makes you SMILE!!

I’m way behind, so sending out a gazillion of them over cyberspace to y’all!

Luv from the Bush in Quebec

THE BOXES

Tao, my youngest rug rat

I spent the day yesterday going through boxes, and boxes, and boxes which have been piled in my garage since Bird moved in with me this summer. Today his lady friend will stop by to pick up what he wanted her to have. I have not been able to reach the young man who was to receive Bird’s power tools, so those will be set aside until he shows up.

My brother, like the rest of our family, was a packrat, strongly believing that even if you haven’t used something for years, you will need it the day after you get rid of it. When my daughter and I packed for him, we were warned not to throw away anything! We heeded his wishes, for the most part, but I didn’t even bother to open those boxes which my daughter had labeled ‘Bird’s Junk’. Those, together with his clothes, will be picked up by a truck from the organization catering to the homeless. I worked for that organization for 4 years, and know it will be well distributed.

I wasn’t looking forward to the task, but it actually wasn’t so bad. Yes, more than once I had to swallow hard to keep going, but just as often I laughed, recalling events surrounding a certain article, or shaking my head as I wondered why on earth he would have kept this or that. In his papers I found every card I had ever given him for his birthday or for Christmas over the years. I wasn’t surprised; I put them away where I keep all those he has given me.

I’m pretty adept at controlling my feelings when I’m awake and alert. Our defenses crumble when we sleep. Hauling all those boxes around made me tired enough to snooze for a couple of hours last night, and I don’t remember what I dreamed to wake me up in such a mood. I just knew, when my eyes opened, there would be no use of my trying to stay in bed. Even working, my usual escape, was not going to help. On Friday night my daughter-in-law had sent me a trilogy written by Nora Roberts, so I picked up the first book and lost myself in her story. I should send that writer a thank you card.

I am tired this morning, but it’s a brand new day. The sun is shining, and my daughter is on her way here now; she’ll be staunch moral support as I watch the first of Bird’s belonging be taken away. Maybe this evening I’ll drop in on my daughter-in-law to thank her for the books, and to immerse myself in cuddles from my three young grandbabies. I’ve yet to find something to better soothe emotions than the kisses and hugs from those beautiful rug rats. I know, when I leave to come home, that I’ll be SMILING.

Luv from the Bush in Quebec

HEALING

Bird's moon, from his camera

I can’t listen to his music yet….but I will…eventually. It was our home base, his music. He burned CD after CD of my favorite tunes – older ones I had forgotten – until I heard them again. I would know all the words – I could sing along, or, as he called it, make a joyful noise, while listening. A lot of them were to keep me from dozing off while driving home at the end of a long day at work.

Some nights are hard to get through. Sleep comes for an hour or two, and then I wake. I shut down any thoughts by getting up and doing something…anything…until I’m tired enough to fall into an immediate slumber again. Fortunately that is the period where my internet stream is the fastest, so I am able to work by remote on my city computer server; the hours are not lost, but crowded with numbers instead of feelings.

It’s going to take time, and tears that I am not yet ready to cry. Most of you have dealt with this; you know what I’m saying – how I feel. And we all know that life does go on.

This weekend I have to empty his belongings from the garage. I need the space for office furniture. When I returned to work, Line warned me that she was leaving within a few days. It has all been too much for her. I considered hiring someone else, then decided that no – I’ve had enough of losing 4 hours a day commuting to the city. I’m bringing my office home. Most communication with clients is done by telephone, fax or internet anyway. For those I need to meet on occasion, I’ll just drive into the city and do so. Everything has to be moved by the end of the month, and it involves a lot of work. It’s a blessing in disguise. I’m too damned busy to get mired in self pity.

I missed writing. I have not been in the right mind set to put words on paper. I have been reading though, slipping in and out of Blogit, following Kilroy’s blog, checking Facebook and my e-mails now and then. Comments and responses were put off for a bit, and I apologize. I did receive and deeply appreciated all your messages, and believe that I have answered most of them by now.

Grump and I have resumed our nightly excursions on the country roads, usually accompanied by the beautiful Louka. This week the weather was so nice, and we were treated to the spectacular glow that is particular to a full autumn moon. I stood on the top of hill, listening to the silence of the bush. It was disturbed only by the sound of obscured doggies sniffing around in piles of dry leaves.

As I stood gazing at this awesome scene, Nature’s fingers reached in and touched my soul. A rush of love filled me, and I knew my brother was near. I acknowledged his presence with a warm embrace, then blew him a kiss. I felt the gentle stroke of healing begin, and I SMILED.

Luv from the Bush in Quebec