STILL SMILING

When scans showed that the lung tumours are growing in spite of radiation and chemo injections, the doc prescribed an oral chemo called Tarceva. It is terribly expensive but is “the last resort” (the term the doc used). Because Bird was already on a disability pension, the government agreed to pay for it. Bird read over the side effects, and has refused to take it. It is not a cure, but a palliative measure. He has decided to go with dignity; once again the quality of life wins out over the quantity.

In the meantime, we have visited a Naturopath. I read Kevin Trudeau’s books (still growling!), at the suggestion of the Bird, by the way, and have been preparing organic food and juices for the past two weeks. It HAS made a difference. He has more energy, is more alert...just feels all-round better. The Naturopathic doctor suggested injections of Vitamin C and mistletoe. These cannot be done legally in Quebec; only traditional doctors can administer such a thing, so we have made an appointment to have them done in Ottawa. Ontario is more lenient it seems. I made sure to inform his lung specialist who, although disappointed that Bird is not doing the Tarceva, asked us to meet the Homeopathic representative from the hospital just to be certain that any treatment, be it pharmaceutical or organic, is not in conflict with the other. Problem: the injections were to start on Sept. 20th, but the appointment with the hospital rep is on Sept. 27th...which means another delay for time that is already short.

What we are living right now is not easy, nor is it made easier by knowing that others have, and will again, go through the same thing....or worse. However, there are special moments of love, of sharing, of laughter, that would probably not occur during days of ordinary existence, and for that I am grateful. We have been allowed time for a proper goodbye and, as Bird quips “We’ll just take our time saying it, thank you!”

The sense of humour is still intact. When going for a scan of his spine (a tumour has shown up there too), the Bird was wearing his Toronto Maple Leaf cap. The young technician grimaced when he saw it.

“You’re lucky I allow you into my scanning room wearing that hat,” he told Bird. Used to the reaction he gets in this Hab-fevered city, Bird smiled.

“Been waiting for years to see them take the Stanley Cup,” he answered. “Now that I’m dying, they’ll probably get it.”

“Ha!” scoffed the technician. “If that’s what you’re waiting on, you’ll live for another 30 years!”

The Bird winked. “Exactly!” he exclaimed.

And we all SMILED.